“The Seventh Commandment”
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In the Los Angeles Time there was an article… One morning at breakfast, Cathy Gallagher told her husband she wanted to start a line of greeting cards for adulterers.
There was a pregnant pause. And then he said, “I think it’s a great idea.”
Lucky for him, Gallagher doesn’t plan on patronizing her own business. “You don’t have to be a murderer to write a murder mystery,” she says.
Nor, apparently, does one need to be unfaithful to write a Christmas card that says, “As we each celebrate with our families, I will be thinking of you.”
Gallagher says her Secret Lover Collection of 24 cards is the first line exclusively for people having affairs, and she expects hot sales. She says half of married people have had affairs. From former President Clinton’s relationship with “that woman” to shenanigans on TV shows like “Desperate Housewives,” affairs are out in the open.
“Look at the soap operas. It’s all about forbidden love,” Gallagher says in her Bethesda office, where the walls are painted red and pink. “Look at how many people on soap operas are having affairs. That’s real. And I think that’s why this is so scary -- these cards are real, and for a lot of people it hits very close to home.”
Jesus called it did he not? A wicked and adulterous generation… man we have done a number on adultery today have we not? It is all over the entertainment world we see it exampled in public life. Books like bridges over madison country are celebrated. Modern music also has institutionalized adultery through lyrics that celebrate infidelity. At times, adultery creates the dramatic conflict for our sitcoms, and increasingly it is the backdrop to the news stories on the front page, internet, social media. A Generation X spokesman proclaimed, "We are the first generation in which adultery is now not an issue. We have so little expectation of monogamy or of faithfulness, adultery is just no big deal." But really this is nothing new.
In a book called “Calvin’s Company of Pastors”, which documents minutes of Geneva. He looked at the records from 1542-1609 (over 60 years), finding 1,572 disciplinary cases involving men and 777 involving women who were suspended for “quarrels”. “Quarrels” usually meant household conflicts—often marital difficulties, abuse, or mistreatment. He also found 636 men and 538 women who were suspended for either fornication or adultery. In fact, he lists over 20 different offenses that were subject to discipline in the Geneva churches during this period, and the top two sins were easily household conflict and sexual sin.
During the time of Luther churches would hire pastor’s who had a number of misteresses along with his wife. Historian… D’Augbine wrote that is they had misteresses then there would be a good chance that they would not seduce their own wives. Adultery was a given.
During the time of the Israelites… Adultery was punishable my death. And people were still doing it. It was so seductive that people were willing to give up their lives for it.
In the past 30 years of ministry i would say that over 90 percent of my counseling have to do with marriage and sex problems. In a way, it does make sense. Think about it… two of God’s greatest gifts. There is no relationship which can be so intimate, so life-giving, and so joy-filled as the marital relationship; and there is no experience that can be as intimate and powerful within that marriage relationship as sex. So, of course, the enemy is going to go after these two great gifts to all people. We should expect confusion, misunderstanding, perversion, and (sadly) pain—not because sex and marriage are bad, or not worth the trouble, but precisely because they are such good gifts. God’s best gifts are the ones most apt to be twisted and perverted by the world, the flesh, and the enemy.
This is why today we need to take a sobering look at the essense of the Seventh Commandment.
“You must not commit adultery.
The grass withers, the flower fades, but the word of our God stands forever.
The 5 C’s of Marriage
Adultery
Divine Faithfulness
The first thing we will look at today are the 5 C’s that characterize this thing we call marriage and how transgression of the 7th commandment destroys them all. The second thing we will look at is how the transgression of the seventh commandment is also more than just the physical act of Adultery. Finally, we will see how salvation has come to us because of true faithfulness to the covenant by the power of the Sprit in Christ and Christ alone.
Thesis: Though sin and the pattern of this world may cause us to assimilate or be annihilated by the cultures incessant celebration of adultery, it is the true divine faithfulness of Christ and the power of the Spirit of God that will bring all the rewards of covenant faithfulness as we are indeed united with Christ in the power of His might.
I. The 5 C’s of Marriage
- Complement, Covenant, Children, Christ, and the Church.
A. I think that in order for us to really see the devastation of adultery it might be helpful for us to get a good quick biblical framework of marriage. First up is the all famous...
Then the Lord God said, “It is not good for the man to be alone. I will make a helper who is just right for him.” So the Lord God formed from the ground all the wild animals and all the birds of the sky. He brought them to the man to see what he would call them, and the man chose a name for each one. He gave names to all the livestock, all the birds of the sky, and all the wild animals. But still there was no helper just right for him.
So the Lord God caused the man to fall into a deep sleep. While the man slept, the Lord God took out one of the man’s ribs and closed up the opening. Then the Lord God made a woman from the rib, and he brought her to the man.
“At last!” the man exclaimed.
“This one is bone from my bone,
and flesh from my flesh!
She will be called ‘woman,’
because she was taken from ‘man.’ ”
This explains why a man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.
Now the man and his wife were both naked, but they felt no shame.
B. This whole picture is summarized by the word “complement.” What this means is that God created marriage in such a manner that a man and a woman would uniquely fit together as complements for one another. Verse 18—”I will make him a helper fit for him”—and again in verse 20: Adam looked around, and there were birds, animals, and livestock, but “there was not found a helper fit for him.” There was no one among the creation who was a suitable complement for Adam.
C. And the picture becomes even more beautiful. Well so how did God make a helper suitable for him. He did not create another animal or another man, but created a woman who was taken out of man and given a name from man. She was called woman because she was taken out of man. There is complement all around… in how the woman was formed, in the name that she was given, and in how she alone is considered a suitable helpmate for the man.
D. The picture of complement is further developed in the picture of what we call the creation mandate. Woman is the only thing that can fulfill with man the mandate.
Then God blessed them and said, “Be fruitful and multiply. Fill the earth and govern it. Reign over the fish in the sea, the birds in the sky, and all the animals that scurry along the ground.”
E. If God created another man to be with Adam, or another woman to be with Eve, they would not have fit together and for the big reason that they would not be able to fulfill this mandate. They couldn’t be fruitful and multiply. Only through the complement of the sexes can this be fulfilled.
F. The second passage to continue our framework is found in...
Here is another thing you do. You cover the Lord’s altar with tears, weeping and groaning because he pays no attention to your offerings and doesn’t accept them with pleasure. You cry out, “Why doesn’t the Lord accept my worship?” I’ll tell you why! Because the Lord witnessed the vows you and your wife made when you were young. But you have been unfaithful to her, though she remained your faithful partner, the wife of your marriage vows.
Didn’t the Lord make you one with your wife? In body and spirit you are his. And what does he want? Godly children from your union. So guard your heart; remain loyal to the wife of your youth.
G. What we find here is the demonstration of what we see as Covenant and Children. In verse 14, the marriage relationship is described as a vow or more specifically, a covenant bond between two parties. When a covenant is made, it must be in a sense signed and sealed. We have the verbal vow. Then there is the ratification vow, which is the sexual act. The act of sexual consummation signs and seals the covenant. It is a bond in blood which cannot be broken until death do us part.
H. And what is the purpose of this covenant? Godly Children. There are deliberate echoes of Genesis here in the pattern of leaving and cleaving as one flesh. Part of what God was seeking was godly offspring. While it would be wrong to say that procreation is the sole purpose of marriage, or that sexual intimacy is only given as a means to reproduce, it would also be wrong to think that marriage can be properly defined without any reference to the offspring that normally result from the one flesh union of a husband and a wife. Um that’s we should not be shocked when our wives become pregnant and say “how did that happen?” That’s what God is seeking. By definition, marriage is the sort of union from which children can be conceived.
I. And now we look at ...
For wives, this means submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of the church. He is the Savior of his body, the church. As the church submits to Christ, so you wives should submit to your husbands in everything.
For husbands, this means love your wives, just as Christ loved the church. He gave up his life for her to make her holy and clean, washed by the cleansing of God’s word. He did this to present her to himself as a glorious church without a spot or wrinkle or any other blemish. Instead, she will be holy and without fault. In the same way, husbands ought to love their wives as they love their own bodies. For a man who loves his wife actually shows love for himself. No one hates his own body but feeds and cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church. And we are members of his body.
As the Scriptures say, “A man leaves his father and mother and is joined to his wife, and the two are united into one.” This is a great mystery, but it is an illustration of the way Christ and the church are one.
J. The relationship between Christ and the church is the pinnacle of the relationship between a husband and a wife. What this means is that the union between man and wife is a picture that teaches us of the union between Christ and the church. When the Lord desired to teach us of the relationship of union with Christ that we as Christian’s share with the Lord, he gave us the wonderful revelation of a marriage. He designed for a Christian husband and wife to come together in such a way that this union of Christ and the church can be referenced and symbolized.
K. Notice that Paul’s reference to the mystery of Christ and the church only works if there is differentiation in the marital union. Sometimes people get slippery with their language and say, “Yes, isn’t it beautiful? With Christ and the church, you have this mutual indwelling, love, and support for one another. Any two people coming together can show that love and support for one another.” But that’s not the argument that Paul makes. His argument is based on differentiation: namely, the man loves, leads, and sacrifices as Christ; and the woman submits and respects as the church. However that plays out in practice, the irreducible minimum is that these two agents are not interchangeable. Paul did not foresee any two individuals acting as Christ and the church, but rather that one would be a husband to cherish like Christ, and the other would be a wife to follow like the church.
L. In other words, we cannot insert two men or two women into the logic of Ephesians 5 and get the same mystery, let alone the same full-orbed picture of the gospel. That is why it’s not a rhetorical exaggeration to say that the gospel itself is at stake in our definition of marriage. Paul himself links the gospel of Christ and the church to the expression of a godly Christian marriage, which can only find fulfillment in a husband and wife coming together in this union.
M. When we look at all of this, It’s no wonder that the Bible considers adultery, fornication, bestiality, homosexuality, prostitution, and every kind of unchastity that would strike at these building blocks out of bounds.
II. Adultery
- The defecation and destruction of marriage.
A. The Heidelberg Catechism helps us here...
What does the seventh commandment teach us?
That all unchastity is cursed by God. We must therefore detest it from the heart and live chaste and disciplined lives, both within and outside of holy marriage.
Does God in this commandment forbid nothing more than adultery and similar shameful sins?
Since we, body and soul, are temples of the Holy Spirit, it is God's will that we keep ourselves pure and holy.Therefore he forbids all unchaste acts, gestures, words, thoughts, desires, and whatever may entice us to unchastity
B. One scripture on this
“You have heard the commandment that says, ‘You must not commit adultery.’ But I say, anyone who even looks at a woman with lust has already committed adultery with her in his heart. So if your eye—even your good eye—causes you to lust, gouge it out and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell. And if your hand—even your stronger hand—causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.
C. “Epithumeo”. It’s the word translated in verse 28 as “with lustful intent”. Lest we come to this point in the sermon and think, “This has been a good sermon. It’s been very interesting. I’ve learned a few things. There are a lot of people in the world who need to hear this”, we need to hear what Jesus says. Sexual sin is a matter of the heart. Of course, it isn’t only a heart matter. Jesus isn’t saying you can have sex with whoever you want as long as your heart is okay. No, that would be an impossibility. He’s saying that even if you don’t commit the physical act with your sexual organs, you can still be guilty of sexual sin by means of your thoughts, fantasies, desires, and affections.
III. Divine Faithfulness
- His promises are yes and Amen.
A. So in essense adultery happens in a spiritual sense. When the Israelites would turn away from God and worship Idols, the Lord would call the behavior Adulterous. If we turn away from the Lord and turn to any kind of idol, we commit adultery in our heart against the Lord. Whenever we give away what belongs to the Lord, we commit adultery.
B. That is the reality of our faithlessness. Our sin. Our fallen state. We all have sinned and fallen short. We are all polluted. And we all have commited adulterous acts in many different ways. But in light of the Gospel we have hope today. The people of God, those who the Lord saves will become what He calls the bride. The church.
C. When the bride is presented to the Bridegroom without spot and without blemish, it will not be because the bride has tidied herself up. It will not be because the bride has decided to cover her own sin. It will not be because the bride, looking back at the horror of what she has done, will simply say, "Well, we will do this no more, and from henceforth we will be faithful." Rather, it is because the redeeming love of God will cleanse this bride of all iniquity. Her sin will be known no more.
D. It happens because Jesus died for our sins according to the scriptures… The saying is trustworthy and deserving of full acceptance...
E. The promises continues